The River's Badge

Friday, April 1, 2011

My Latest Computer-Generated Song




Yes, you, too, can create your own computer-generated song!

It seems like a dream, doesn't it? But it's true! (Okay, it's really just another version of Mad Libs, but hey!)

Alas, it's not really a song, because it's just lyrics. But I'm looking for a co-writer, cuz I just know that this is going to be huge!

Apparently, this is titled, "The Ballad of My Overweight Hairdresser Acquaintance":

The Tale of My Overweight Hairdresser Acquaintance
- A Ballad


It began on a spineless Arbor Day lunchtime:
I was the most stupid philosopher around,
He was the most overweight hairdresser.

He was my acquaintance,
My overweight acquaintance,
My hairdresser.

We used to eat so well together,
Back then.
We wanted to skip together, around the world,
We wanted it all.

But one lunchtime, one spineless lunchtime,
We decided to skip too much.
Together we teased a magic leprechaun.
It was fluffy, so fluffy.

From that moment our relationship changed.
He grew so grouchy.

And then it happened:

Oh no! Oh no!

He channeled Mister Spock.
Alas, Mister Spock!
My acquaintance channeled Mister Spock.
It was annoying, so annoying.

The next day I thought my eyebrows had broken,
I thought my little toe had burst into flames,
(But I was actually overreacting a little.)

But still, he is in my thoughts.
I think about how it all changed that lunchtime,
That spineless Arbor Day lunchtime.

My little toe... ouch!
When I think of that overweight hairdresser,
That overweight hairdresser and me.


It could use some fine-tuning, admittedly.

If you would like to generate your own pre-fab song lyrics, go here.

I'm thinking of pitching this to Alanis Morissette.

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